Alcohol and Stress: Why Teens Turn to Unhealthy Coping

Alcohol and stress are closely connected for today’s teens. When young people feel overwhelmed, pressured, or emotionally unsupported, they may be more likely to turn to unhealthy coping behaviors. Creating emotional safety at home, keeping communication open, and setting clear expectations together can help reduce that risk and support healthier choices. 

Why Stress Feels So Heavy for Teens Today

From academic demands and extracurricular expectations to social stressors and family responsibilities, it’s no wonder teens feel like they’re constantly under pressure. Plus, with the addition of social media, where teens are continually exposed to idealized versions of other people’s lives, it’s easy to see why so many kids feel overwhelmed.  

The invisible pressure of simultaneously keeping up with expectations, relationships, and future plans is known as a “mental load.” When teens are trying to juggle multiple priorities, it’s not uncommon for them to act irritable or withdrawn, making it harder for parents to notice when something is wrong. Stress isn’t always obvious, and it can be hard to recognize until it starts affecting your teen’s behavior. 

How Stress Environments Can Lead to Risky Coping  

High-pressure environments don’t automatically lead to unhealthy choices. However, unmanaged stress can make teens more vulnerable to risky behaviors. When teens feel overwhelmed, they’re more likely to start looking for quick ways to escape anxious thoughts or emotional discomfort. For some, alcohol use can seem like an easy way to relax or take the edge off. But remember, alcohol doesn’t actually reduce stress; it simply numbs it temporarily. This can make emotions harder to deal with later.  

When stress goes unmanaged for too long, teens may start looking for quick relief instead of long-term solutions. This is where the connection between alcohol and stress becomes important. Over time, some teens may begin using substances to cope with their feelings rather than dealing with the stress itself. This pattern, often referred to as emotional drinking, can develop when teens don’t have the healthy coping skills to manage their big emotions or pressures.   

Signs Your Teen May Be Using Unhealthy Coping 

While it’s important to understand how alcohol and stress intersect, what’s equally crucial is understanding what stress looks like in teens. Below are signs that it may be time to intervene: 

• Increased secrecy or withdrawal 
• Sudden mood changes 
• Declining interest in school or activities 
• Hanging out with a new friend group 
• Talking about needing something to “relax” or “take the edge off”

If you notice any of the above signs in your teen, it doesn’t necessarily mean something is “wrong.” However, it can signal that your teen is struggling and needs additional support.  

Healthy Ways Teens Can Cope with Stress

Everyone feels stressed at times. Unfortunately, stress is unavoidable. However, there are safer, healthier ways to cope with stress that don’t involve alcohol or other substance use. For instance, some tools to help teen stress include:  

• Physical activity 
• Creative projects or outlets 
• Mindfulness 
• Talking with trusted adults 
• Sleep and routine stability

It’s important to remember that these coping skills can be learned. They are not personality traits that a person either has or doesn’t have. Skills can always be improved upon.  

How Parents Can Reduce Stress at Home 

As a parent, helping your child regulate their stress level can feel overwhelming, especially when you consider many of us have such a hard time dealing with our own stress. Fortunately, there are ways you can reduce stress for your entire household. Realistically, parents can focus on maintaining the following:   

• Creating calm, predictable routines 
• Reducing overscheduling 
• Keeping communication open 
• Avoiding lectures and leading with curiosity 
• Modeling healthy stress coping 

Lowering stress at home can reduce the appeal of unhealthy coping behaviors, like emotional drinking. When families work together to create a calmer, more supportive environment, teens are better equipped to manage pressure without turning to risky activities.   

How Talking About Alcohol and Stress Helps Teens Make Safer Choices

Conversations—even brief ones—matter. Talking to your teens about alcohol and stress doesn’t have to be a big, sit-down talk. Instead, having a series of mini check-ins can be a lot more productive. Creating an open dialogue with your teen helps build trust. When teens feel supported and heard, they’re more likely to make safer choices.  

Unsure how to break the ice with your teen? Here are a few conversation starters to help you:   

• “What’s been stressing you out the most lately?” 
• “What helps you unwind when things feel overwhelming?” 
• “Have you heard about your friends or classmates coping with stress in ways that don’t seem healthy?”

Remember: Talking early and often reduces the shame and secrecy around stress and alcohol. When teens find themselves in a situation that makes them uncomfortable, they’re more likely to look for help from an adult they trust.  

How Talk It Out NC Can Help

Talk It Out NC, funded by the North Carolina Alcoholic Beverage Control Commission, is a program dedicated to reducing underage drinking statewide. With a mission to support parents, caregivers, teachers, and other trusted adults, we provide the tools, resources, and education needed to start meaningful conversations with teens about alcohol and support healthier choices.  

However, you don’t have to navigate these conversations alone. Talk It Out NC is here to support families in starting meaningful conversations that help build strong connections with your teen. Check out our resources and learn ways to start the conversation today.